Dear Friends and Family,
I write to you all with many thoughts in my head and many things on my heart. I want to share with you what has been happening since last wed here in Jeffreys Bay. It all started on Thursday. Our team of 14 girls for next semester for the JBay team met together to spend time in prayer. We spent about a hour in prayer and being led by the spririt. I begged God, that He would break my heart for what breaks His, and that He would give me a holy rage for the injustice in this city. Well, He started to answer my prayers immediately as I went to Ithemba that day, CoCo a little 5 year old boy that lives with his father that drinks all the time, and his 9 year old sister that takes care of him. We found out that if we were to give clothes to CoCo for Christmas, that his father would take them away and sell them for liquor, and put dirty clothes on him again. I couldn’t believe it, a father would take his own child’s clothes and sell them to feed his addiction.
My team then learned about what is going on in Zimbabwe. They have had an outbreak of cholra, that has killed close to 600 people, and has infected over 12,000. The president/ruler of Zimbabwe has refused to do anything about it, and has chosen to ignore the problem. The 6 largest hospitals have been closed, because of no medicine or medical supplies. There is simply no food or water to drink in the country, so people have started to eat bugs to simply survive. There are people here I have become friends with, that are from Zimbabwe and have gone back to visit their country and try to provide aid. They left last Friday and will return on the 20th of December.
Please remember these guys in your prayers: Melvin, Calvin, Ricky and Arthur
My heart grew heavy as the day went on and I wondered how I could even begin to help or make a difference in these people’s lives. I didn’t think I could handle going out that night and doing more ministry.
Every Tuesday and Thursday, there is a group of about 5 or 6 of us that hang out with the street kids for about a hour and give them bread and just get to know them. The street kids are a group of about 15-20 boys, and one girl that literally live on the streets of JBay. They beg for food, sleep on the streets and spend most of the day getting high-sniffing glue. I told God, I couldn’t do this tonight, but with His strength I would press on. Satan defintely knew that God was at work, because he tried to show up right away. We were in a conversation with one of the boys, probably the most deep coversation we have had the whole year. Blair, one of my teammates was talking to the boys about how everything is impossible without God. That they can try as hard as they want to stop smoking, sniffing glue and drinking, but without God it is impossible. The boys were really listening, when a man that was pretty much crazy came up and started to speak in Afrikaans to the boys. Clearly angry at them and us for what we were doing. We tried to greet the man, but he wouldn’t even look at us. Satan’s first attempt. The man eventually walked away, and we got to pray with the boys.
The next situation we came across was Jonathan (10 year old) crying because another boy had stolen his glue. He was so upset he wouldn’t even look at us, he sat there with his head in his arms, crying. All I could think about was -this is just like my brother. He is just a little 10 year old boy that wants to be loved and accepted. As we sat there with Jonathan in silence, a angry fisherman came up and started rattling over in Afrikaans. He showed us a bite on his chest, that he had received from another fisherman that had gotten angry at him for taking another job. He talked about how the fisherman here have gone mad. How they have riots about every 3 days, breaking cars and homes, and getting into fights. I tried to put myself in his shoes, and imagine what his life was like, as I did, I tried to hold back the tears and listen to this man’s pain. My heart broke. As we walked back, I started to ask God the hard questions that I had chosen not to dare ask Him. “Why God?”
That night we had a time of worship. I sat there not being able to sing- “He is Good.” I sat there weeping over what I had seen and crying out to God asking why the pain, why the injustice, why He said in His word He would not leave us as orphans, but come to us. But yet here where boys clearly orphans and alone. As I wept and doubted God’s goodness, I realized that God had completely answered my prayer from that morning. My heart was feeeling the pain that God feels for these people. My heart was breaking over the things that break His heart. I went to bed that night with a heavy heart, not knowing what to do with this burden that I now carried.
The next morning (Friday) we went as a small group to St. Francis Bay. A beautiful bay about 30 minutes from Jeffreys. They gave us a hour to be alone and spend time with God. As I sat there in silence, listening to the crashing waves, the sun’s heat beaming down on me and everything in place. God spoke to me so clearly like so many other times. “Ellen, I AM big enough. I am bigger then Zimbabwe. I am bigger then the pain of Africa. I am bigger then the fisherman’s strike. I AM this big. Look around, I created this.” I realized at that moment that I had taken the burden of this all on me, but had not laid it down on his feet. I had been trying on my own to save these people, and forgotten I cannot. But God can.
I don’t have the answers, and I can’t save the world or these people. But I know the Creator of the universe that CAN. And I have chosen to rest in that.
Running After Him,
-Ellie
It is amazing to hear how God is using you to impact the people of Africa, but it’s also so amazing how God is using them to impact you.
I pray for you everyday, and I am so proud of you Ellen.
Oh Ellen,
My heart is stirred by your challenging message. He is BIG ENOUGH. Thank you so much for sharing this inspiring story. I love you, dear friend. I am praying for you daily.
-BFF 🙂
Hugs are coming to you as I write this. You are going through an experience many of us will never know. God will prove himself faithful to you and to those you love. He is going to raise you up, higher and higher, to love those others can’t or won’t. You are sitting in the center of His will for you, as you continue to stay right there, watch for mighty answers to your prayers! We love you and will “step up” the prayers for you!
Thanks for sharing.
Heb 6:10